Shinji Critique #3 - Black Pine

Ralph

Traditional bunjin display. Excellent development of the needles.
Pot should be change to give more emphasis to nebari.

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capobianco

Tree is off balance and top heavy. Lighten the canopy. No stand. Can't see nebari and/or ground covers. Not sure what that thing sticking up on the bottom right is. Nice container.

Lesley

Possibly thin foliage to show more trunk near apex? Lesley

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Ladybug

Carl_Bergstrom

DISCLAIMER: I do not feel that I have put in the hours of study
necessary to be qualified to engage in formal critique of bonsai
displays. Nonetheless, for the purposes of this contest I will attempt
to offer a few impressions.

I find this the most difficult of the six to critique.

This is a very unusual - and very beautiful presented - image. The
pot, and surface moss, are beautifully groomed and wonderfully suited
to the overall image. The twisting shari is natural and subtle -
rather than drawing the eye as some supposed virtuosity of bonsai
styling, it simply and quietly adds in gentle detail to the
composition. The perfectly directed needles and the fine, balanced
branching structure reveal a tree in great health that has clearly
enjoyed years of expert and exacting care.

My concern with this tree is a seeming incongruity between canopy and
base. The base and trunk are fluid and strongly directed; the canopy
is soft, settled down into gentle statis, and visually quiet. For its
base, this gorgeous canopy seems too stable, too balanced, too solid,
too heavy both kinetically and with respect to overall visual
mass. Continued leftward movement, or even a sharp rightward cutback,
would continue the dynamicism and relieve the visual dampening
currently imposed by the canopy's form. A sparser canopy, with gaps in
the foliage, would help as well.

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In love with trees