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13-Jul-2006
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#1 |
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bonsaiTALK Adept
Join Date: Apr-2006
Location: SYDNEY
Country: AUSTRALIA
Posts: 237
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sargent juniper
this tree is my most favorite tree ,i bought it for $70 6years ago from george stockton in strathfield,its said to be about 30 years old .Ive hade it restyled for me by a bonsai teacher at a local club and am pleased with the out come .
Any comments or opions on this tree would be greatly welcomed thanks simon |
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13-Jul-2006
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#2 |
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GREEN HORN
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Iv'e got a comment,..WOW ! Nice ! , ok so that's two comments, a little refinement and some fine wirirng and she'll be ready for a show.
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"Although profoundly "inconsequential," the Zen experience has consequences in the sense that it may be applied in any direction, to any conceivable human activity, and that wherever it is so applied it lends an unmistakable quality to the work." ~ Alan Watts (1915-1973)
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13-Jul-2006
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#3 |
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bonsaiTALK ArchMaster
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I guess the biggest thing about the tree that I noticed was the pot. It's a little distracting...too heavy (too deep and too massive) visually for the trunk. The etched panels are a little ostentatious and distract from the tree.
The other thing is the foliage. It's nicely shaped, but the trunk isn't up to the job of supporting that much foliage mass. I kept looking at the nice developd foliage pads, then down at the trunk and couldn't help but think--the trunk should be about two inches wider... |
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13-Jul-2006
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#4 |
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bonsaiTALK Craftsman
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The trunk should be wider for all that foliage yes....
But..... I am all about a story, not the usual story, like, 'well the snow has been on the branches since birth, that with the wind and you get this....' No, not that at all, I mean a real story, right now this tree reminds me of a timid little kid standing at the 'grown ups' table during thanksgiving trying to get some ones attention because all he wants is some freaking mashed potatoes...... I think there is room for bending in that trunk, and I think some of the lower branches could go, and you could tell a different story, something of a lookout not atop a mountain, but maybe of the highest point in a wooded area, and atop the hill it is clear but this one tree, scanning the world for change and warning the others below him..... I'll work a sketch...... crabs><>
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13-Jul-2006
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#5 |
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bonsaiTALK Adept
Join Date: Apr-2006
Location: SYDNEY
Country: AUSTRALIA
Posts: 237
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Hey Some Great Advise Id Love To See The Sketch -what A Great Story
Thanks Again Simon |
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14-Jul-2006
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#6 |
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bonsaiTALK Master Chief
Join Date: Mar-2006
Location: West Springfield Massachusetts
Country: USA
USDA Zone: zone 5
Posts: 1,202
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What they said, try to get the foliage pads separated a bit, so you get that, the birds can fly thru feel , or make enough room to pitch a cat thru
 (can't remember where I heard that one), air it out a bit, let the light in for the inner branching. Not so bad on the eyes though. |
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14-Jul-2006
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#7 |
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Bonsai Doer
 
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When I look at the picture very fast and then close my eyes I see a very nice Xmas tree left over from the past year. It is perfectly shaped for a nice little xmas tree. The problem is the image we strive for in bonsai is not the image of a left over young xmas tree. I want to have a tree that evokes an older image.
I would lose some branches, bend them down to look much older and add some jins and shari's to age it. Then I would plant it into a much shallower rectangle tray. Nice tree now, could be awesome with a little help.
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A tree a day...thats all we ask. |
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14-Jul-2006
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#8 |
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bonsaiTALK Craftsman
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The sketch and the tree are different, thats just how it is, I wasn't sketching your tree so much as I was trying to tell a story using the options your tree affords us. After looking your tree over again, and the proportions of the sketch, I would wager a guess that the sketch is on the sparse side, but that is for emphasis of a point. Also notice that there's no juniper foliage, but twigs, thats not important either, in this example, as we are not looking at your tree compared to the sketch, but rather, the possiblity that you could tell a similar story with your tree.
The only thing that I would say is going to involve some thinking or waiting I guess, the the nebari on your tree, for that I sketched a generic nebari. I really think that in one session you could get that 'finished' look that we all love so much, but the nebari is going to be a sore thumb until you get it worked out. That being said, think for a moment, about the apex of the sketch, how it comes back to balance things out, I may resketch the apex, if people have trouble imagining, but imagine it didn't come back, but continued with a 'leftward' motion, how it would change the feel of the tree, to maybe slightly windswept, maybe caught up in a breeze. It would enhance that 'watcher' feel if the branches were a little windswept, if you can imagine that. Any how, here's the sketch. crabs><>
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