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16-May-2008
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#11 |
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wilJohnson
Join Date: Feb-2007
Location: Langley
Country: Canada
Posts: 212
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It kind ahas the same trunk as my mugo pine im training.
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16-May-2008
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#12 |
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bonsaiTALK Master
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Hi Pat,
I think the lower trunk is excellent all the way until it gets to where I have colored red. That section to me totally distracts my eye from the wonderful lower section of the trunk. I would bend that section to the right to continue the trunks movement or at the very least cover it with a branch to hide it. Other than that ~ nice start! Jason |
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16-May-2008
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#14 |
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Transplanted Jungle Rat
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Just read this thread for the first time. Great piece of raw material to start with! You could develop this into something full of character.
I think Jason is onto something: the upper trunk doesn't continue the theme of the lower. (And the lower is the tree's strongest feature.) My suggestion: lower the top and bring the apex to the right. Yes, I know this will create an "S-curve" of sorts, but with the tree's taper and drama, in this case I believe it will work.
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Treebeard 55 "... the Lord God made all kinds of trees ... trees that were pleasing to the eye ..." (Genesis 2:9, NIV.) |
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16-May-2008
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#15 | |
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bonsaiTALK Master Chief
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Quote:
Kong loves Kung's natural class....very intense stuff. |
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16-May-2008
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#16 |
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Anticipating to slow time
 
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Jason points out a very intresting flaw, in the 2d image, that I've overlooked because I see the tree daily in 3d. I think allowing the canopy to stretch a bit and wire it down may help to conceal some of this. But I'm also posting some side pics to show that the tree is not as straight as it appears in that image.
The tree does comes back toward the viewer with some decent movement. Patrick |
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17-May-2008
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#17 |
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Bonsai Master, in my mind
Join Date: Feb-2005
Location: Back Home in Northern California
Country: USA
Posts: 1,917
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"...see the tree daily in 3d...".
It is so easy to miss something when you don't see it up close and personal. Nice bonsai Patrick... Pat
__________________
BONSAI isn't about surviving in a storm, rather, how to dance in the rain. THE ONLY WAY: Always remember, and don't ever forget, that whatever you read here is not cast in concrete... the intent of any advice is to help. In no way should you feel that I’m saying that my way is the only way…heaven forbid! I've seen far too much of the "my way or the highway" attitude in bonsai as well as in other areas of life. Pat Patterson...Bonsai in the Greater Bay Area, Northern California
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