I wonder if he does bonsai!
Kits
Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest
2004 Results
An international literary parody contest, the
competition honors the
memory (if not the reputation) of Victorian novelist
Edward George Earl
Bulwer-Lytton (1803-1873). The goal of the contest is
childishly simple: entrants are challenged to submit
bad opening sentences to imaginary novels. Although
best known for "The Last Days of Pompeii" (1834),
which has been made into a movie three times,
originating the expression "the pen is mightier than
the sword, "and phrases like "the great unwashed" and
"the almighty dollar,"
Bulwer-Lytton opened his novel Paul Clifford (1830)
with the immortal words that the "Peanuts" beagle
Snoopy plagiarized for years, "It was a dark and
stormy night."
Winner: Fiction for the Erudite
Clementine sat in the shade of a beech tree, of the
family Fagaceae,
the leaves of which were more or less ovate, being
perhaps not quite as
pointed as those of the North American, grandifolia
species of the Fagus genus that are the color of a
swimming pool that had been left too long without
chlorine, but neither were they like those of Fagus
sylvatica var. purpurea that are the color of dried
burgundy stains on cream linen.
Geoff Beech
Cochabamba
Bolivia
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"Expectations are resentments under construction."
Anne Lamott
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