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Originally Posted by David Yedwab
John,
I like the changes Walter has suggested, especially the slight rotation to take away the symmetry of the two side trunks. I also wonder if the foliage isn't too full. But this is just nitpicking. Also think a smaller, perhaps round pot would help, make the tree look bigger, thicker and maybe older. Perhaps a bit like my box (attached), although it, too, certainly has a way to go.
Surprised "Mr. Oaktree Form Boxwood" Mike Page hasn't chimed in. Hope he will, his observations might be useful.
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David,
Thank you for the input. I struggled with mentioning in the original post that the pot and "hill" were intentionally chosen to mimic an open field with a slight rise. I decided to not say it, and let the bonsai say it for itself. The feedback I'm getting so far is telling me
I failed. The pot is intentionally long, but it only has .75" of interior depth. I said it was 8.5 inches in height, but that measurement INCLUDES the pot. The tree itself is just slightly less than seven inches. The foliage on the left was my main concern, because I have almost cut it back twice in the last week. I am convinced by Walter's (and yours) remark(s) that it needs to be reduced. I also agree the foliage needs to be a little more... indented.
Walter mentioned the hill could stay on a slab. This is a consideration for me. I'm not concerned with making the bonsai appear as a "larger" oak. I wanted it to look like an "average" mature oak sitting on a hill in a pasture at a distance. That still is what I want to accomplish. It is also my personal philosophy of trying to come up with something "different". I realize (and appreciate) the emphasis on making bonsai material look like a large tree, but sometimes I like the view of an average tree with a more "scenic" message. Anyway, the slight rotation is a given, that has to occur. The pot change is a big quandary for my mind. I see exactly what you and Walter are advising about the container issue, but I can't let go of my original plan for this bonsai....not yet anyway. To keep the image/motivation alive AND bring the bonsai into a more defined and technically correct state is a difficult proposition indeed.
The idea came from a drive I took with my family in the NC mountains (a little over an hour from me). We were on the Blue Ridge Parkway and I was looking off to the left and I saw a tree in an open field. As I looked directly at the tree, I saw a small, adult, black bear underneath it!!! Very unusual to see a bear in the open like that. I gave a quick glance back to the road (I was driving) and looked back at the tree and bear. The bear had laid down under the tree. I looked at it as long as I could - while trying to drive safely - and finally lost sight of it. Immediately after I had changed my sight back to the road, a flock of wild turkeys - at least twenty, several were Toms - ran across the road in front of us (none were hit). For some reason, those events burned that tree's image into my memory. I instantly re-visit that scene every time I look at this kingsville. So there's the motivation. I hate to admit it, but if I ever find a great quality ceramic black bear, of the right scale, you KNOW where it will end up!!!
Also, I appreciate the pic of your bonsai. It is a very nice example. It has the appearance of Rodney Clemmons influence. He loves these kind of bonsai from what I know about him. He made a kingsville here in a Charlotte area workshop, that was very similar. I hope your friend does "chime" in, on this thread. I'd love to hear his thoughts as well.
Once again, thank you for your constructive criticism. I appreciate it.
I've attached a pic from when it was brought out of winter storage (very raggedy) that shows the size of the bonsai.
Best regards,
John